At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
