I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
