No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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