My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize