...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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