3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
