What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
