oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
they're like a gay fantastic four
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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