adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
The adults are the big ones right?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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