discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
