I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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