im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
