so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
