yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
