Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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