Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize