I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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