lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
