I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize