Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Randomize
