Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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