i used baking grease as lip gloss
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
