What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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