I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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