I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
MIDGETS
????
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
