I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I look better un-naked...
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
