would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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