Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
