We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Randomize
