We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
How external is "for external use only"?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
