haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
sex in a hospital.. check
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
