so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize