Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
