cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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