Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
