When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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