Ambien. No doubt about it.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
