he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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