He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
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