wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
