69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize