now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
