Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She announced her abortion via fbk
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
