i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
