Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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