i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
