I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
