Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
