they call him Oral-B. enough said
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
