We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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