So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
